Unfamiliar territory

It feels strange to be single and not have a guy, I'm so used to always having someone. I like this independence from it all, I can think clearly and not have to worry about someone else for a chance. I am currently looking for jobs, need some money. I have a new plan. 1. Get a job 2. get a car 3. get a laptop 4. SAVE SAVE SAVE 5. Try my hardest to get an apprenticeship in Midland or Odessa. 6. Either move away if I don't land an apprenticeship or find my own apt if I do get my own place. I will have to work really hard if I want all this, but since I'm the one who is the only one keeping me from starving and being a broke ass I am extremely motivated. Had to trim my goatee today so that I won't look like a crazy ass when I apply, hope it helps. Feels weird to have it short again, but its only hair so it can always be grown back. My brother wants me to help him with his business as a locksmith, I'm thinking about it but don't want to get stuck doing it. I don't see myself living in Midland or even Texas for the rest of my life. I plan to move away to a place where I can be me and not end up with a openly proud gay man and have a group of great friends. But I'd like to have the group of friends more than a man right now, need to get out of this house. I love them but sometimes I need someone else to kick it with. Then again, I hate to be broke and go anywhere. So until I find a job I'm stuck at home with my loving family. I want to go to the clubs but not here, to many hoes. Everyone fucks everyone here and that is some nasty shit. Really thinking about trying to save up for a cruise, think it would be a great adventure and add to my life. I'm sure I'd be able to make some great friends from around the country. To travel is my ultimate dream, I just want to see as much as possible while I can. I only have 1 life and I'm not going to waste it in this town dating a loser.