Forced to wait another day :(

So I found out that my packages are not coming Wednesday but on Thursday, I don't know why that is so but whatever. I at least get to have them together, so that's a yay!! Just don't know what I'm going to do today since I was waiting for it to get here and I could dive right in. Oh and the situation with D still isn't good, we are not talking.

Get over it and live life D

I seriously don't know why D is tripping over the fact that I am on a tattoo chat site, yes I'm telling you all about it while I am checking out guys and hitting on them. Your so damn dumb D get over your untrusting shit and grow up, and how dare you tell me that while I live under your roof I need to obey your rules and not be on the chat site that is helping me with all my tattoo questions and make contacts across America. If you really don't like it then just be respectful and keep it to yourself and never tell me to OBEY your rules, I am your partner and you need to respect me and my dream or we just might need to go separate ways. I don't want you to put something so silly like a chat site between us, I don't know what your problem is but your just going to have to find someway around it because I'm not stopping. I am starting my dream and nobody on this earth is going to be able to stop me from reaching it, if it leads me to being single and alone while reaching it then so be it. But I would much rather prefer that you are there by my side enjoying life beside me, I said I don't want to break up anymore and finally live together with you for the rest of our lives. If that is not what you want then say so and I will leave, I want to be happy with you but if you don't want to be happy with me then I can't stop you now can I. Make up your mind already, are you going to be a selfish and stubborn child or be the man I love and stand by my side like I stand by yours? You don't have to tell me anything because your actions will tell me everything.

Only a few more hours

So I am going to be ordering my first tattoo supplies later on today. I wanted to do it last night but my friend B wasn't online to help me so I am going to give him a call tomorrow after I add mins to my phone. I am so excited to get the stuff.

Got my taxes done

So happy, I'm getting a good amount coming in. Finally gonna get my tattoo gear because D is going to loan me the money because he knows I can pay him back.

Well that was a bust

So I asked D for the $300 loan and well lets just say he didn't just shoot me down he blew my ass out the fucking sky. Sucks that the one person you say you love with your whole heart looks at you and tells you " go to a loan company and see if they would give you a loan without a job" that was low D really low. So now I see how it is going to be, once I get up and going on my dream don't think about asking me for jack. I will help pay bills but other than that your money is yours and mine is mine. Some fucked up relationship huh, can't believe I still say I love you after that crap. Worst part is that I just take it and don't talk back because you know I have nowhere to go if you decide to leave me and force me to move out. Let me tell you that is not a great feeling, but I guess it is what it is. I will smile and tell you I love you till the day I die but remember what you deny me of and know that karma works both ways. I never asked to just give me the money but to simply loan it to me and trust in me that I can make my dream come true, but you don't and that hurts bad. I see you so anxious to hand out hundreds and thousands to your family without hesitation and you know you will never see this money again. It just hurts.

Please say it isn't so

So my sister just called me and said my mom was at the store and when she came out my car wasn't there, she thinks someone stole it. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!! I hope the cops can find it bc i think there is a low jack system on it. It has most of my baby nieces stuff in it as well like car seat and other junk. Damn why did this have to happen, the inspection sticker is out on it too so nobody should have been driving it in the first place.

Getting anxious

Hopefully getting my W2 forms in and sending my income tax off. I need that money bad, think I might ask D for a loan until I get the money. Just don't know if he will lend it to me, sad that I am scared to ask my bf for money to make money. I don't have high hopes for him actually lending to me but what is the harm in asking right? Wish me luck world.