Balmorhea

Here in Balmorhea watching some tv with my in-laws, going to El Paso in the AM so happy to be going to the Zoo. This family is so fun because they are loud and just completely different than my family. I may not be able to always understand them when I am around them but I feel apart of them.

Going to El Paso, TX

Okay so we are about to go to El Paso, Tx this weekend for our nieces 14th birthday. Wow I can still see her as a little girl that would help me take care of her sisters when I used to live with them in Az. Today we are just going to travel to Balmorhea and stay the night there at D's mom's house and then go to El Paso in the morning...like 6am Ugh but its okay. I have not been to El Paso in forever, I think the last time was when my grandmother died. I really want to go to the Zoo ha ha ha, I totally want to see some animals. I'm going to have to talk D into taking me, hopefully its just me and him because I want some alone time with him but knowing him he is going to wanna take his nephews and nieces along and I'll be stuck baby sitting like always. Its not that I don't like the kids its just that well I'm not a child person. I guess it has to do with me having to share D with anyone else, I can't help it I'm selfish. I want all his attention on me because I want to memories to look back on when we grow older. I'm going to take some pics and videos of the trip and hopefully of the ZOO ha ha, so I'll post a few. Well I've gotta get the stuff ready to load up in the truck.

Willow Smith

Okay this lil one is a star already and she is going to be a bigger star in time, if you haven't heard her song 'Whip My Hair' then you need to. The video is so good too. She may be 9 but honey she rocks that hair and has a great voice. I'm rooting for her to beat that lesbian Justin B.

hahaha

Okay I applied at Big 5 for the manager position and well here is how it went. They liked my job history and then he asked me if I was willing to relocate. The way that they do it is they train you in a manager position and ship you off to work in another town, he said it might be somewhere in Cali. Okay I'm not going to lie, it sounds great to be able to move to a new town and experience new things. Now I'm in a LTR and well I can't just leave my family behind especially my mother, and my new cute little apt family of me and D and K and don't forget Ramon (D's cat). I want to be a tattoo artist and that's what made me think about considering taking the offer of managing a store in Cali. oh well there is always going to be another opportunity right. I hope so!! Well that's how that went at Big 5.

Gay movies that I love

Okay I have already stated that I love Netflix, but I love netflix on the Wii because of all the gay themed movies I can watch. Right now D and me are watching The Brokenhearts Club, but some of my other favorite movies are: To Wong Foo thanks for Everything from Julie Newmar, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Connie & Carla, Its a Boy Girl Thing, TransAmerica, Queens and so on and so on. I wish D would just fucking get over his insecurities and just let us have some fucking friends for once. I wanna have some friends over for dinner and a movie or just have a small get together on the weekend. I'm tired of sitting at home all alone with nobody to talk to, I'd like to be able to get out of the house and hang out while D is at work and have him meet up with us after work. But until he realizes that I'm not going anywhere with anybody even if they are hotter or nicer than D, I just want us to have a healthy relationship that includes friends that we can talk to when we are mad at each other or have great conversations about funny shit that has happened to us or just about anything. Man oh man I have gotten so fucking lonely since I gave up having friends in order to have a life with D, sometimes it doesn't seem worth it anymore but I always seem to just move on.

I am going to start applying at places to get a job UGH

So things are not working out how I planned them to be, but its okay right? I mean I do have a roof over my head and food in the fridge. I just have to work harder to get what I need, maybe a good paying job is what I need to get myself started on what I need to start what I truly want for myself. Well here goes nothing.

Netflix

I like that we have netflix because well its great that we get to watch a whole variety of movies that we would never have known about. Right now we are watching a funny but very strange movie about the mob, its got a gay twist to it. I'm so ready for Halloween this year, we are having a party to celebrate our new apt.