7 more days

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy that I finally have my tickets to go see J on the 22nd. 7 more days left. Anxious to finally meet the man I've been talking, e-mailing, and txting for the longest time. Can't wait to give him a big hug and feel him against me. On cloud nine seriously!!!! I love you guys I'll keep you posted on how it turns out.

Best time of my nights

My phone was on the brink of getting cut off last night bc I wasn't able to raise the money at the shop to pay it so I spent almost 3 hours on the phone with J before it was cut off. I love how we never really run out of things to say. So excited to go visit him, I will admit that I have been super giddy since we've planned this get together weekend. I was telling my mother about it and she's already jumping farther ahead than J and me, talking about oh if you like him are you going to move in with him. I was like "damn woman your just ready to get rid of me huh" . She just wants me to be happy, but not going to rush things. Its taken since about december for J and I to plan a meeting so who knows how long it will be before I move with him if we hit things off.

Headed in a great direction

So I've been enjoying the past few days talking with J, literally every night besides tonight we've talked for 2-3 hours on the phone. I have grown to really like him and see a great side of him. So very excited to go visit him in South Texas, I'm going to truly give him the chance he deserves. I will always love my x D but its time to try and move on. I'm happy he never gave up on trying to be with me, its paying off for him.

Taking care of the kids

Taking care of M's kids so she can make money at the shop, yeah its not my thing lol. Love them but I'm going to love giving them back even more. Wow I just changed her little boy's daiper and man this kid can shit.

Moving on

So I am going to take the leap and trust a guy I've been talking to. Going to go visit him on the 22nd for the weekend. I'm really excited to meet him, never seen the beach before. I have put this guy through the ringer and then some through my whole time knowing him and he's still been chasing me so that says something to me. I seriously didn't think his lifestyle and mine would be compatable but the more and more I look at it I realize that it doesn't matter. He completely accepts who and how I am with my tattooing, doesn't mind that I get tattoos. I am going to see how things go on the visit and if all goes well I feel like I could invest more time into him. Oh btw I love talking to him on the phone, never really have a dull moment.

Sometimes music takes the words right out of my mouth

This is how I feel when I think about D. 

Why do you keep coming back?

If your so happy with him now then ask yourself why you keep checking up on my life? I've already said that I will always love you no matter what, even though you hurt me. I am strong enough to look past that and just move on from that, I wouldn't have made myself look like a complete dumb ass trying to get a hold of you and asking your brother and my sister if you were single or if you missed me if I didn't want to be with you. You gave me mixed signals when you hugged me and told me you always thought about me yet say your with someone else, time is not on your side. I can't wait forever for you to decide if you want him or me, I'm not going to allow myself to be the second choice if shit hits the fan with him. Either you want to be with me or you want to be with him. If its him then fine, I'll be happy for you just don't give me some hope that your still thinking about me. If you want to be with me then man up and say so. I'm working my ass off to achieve my dream and live a fantastic life for myself, you can choose to either be apart of that because you love me or let me go for good. What I want from you is to be an honest man and love me for the rest of my life like you first promised me when you first said you loved me, no more secrets or talking to other men. Just have complete faith in each other. I can do that, just tell me you want me and we will be. No games or beating around the bush. Life is to short for all that, you know I love you so come and get me I'm right here D.